~7ANYA

My mood is NOT zeal, I just can't change it for some reason.

After only two weeks, we had to let Oliver go.
I feel really sad and stupid because I should have done more research. Well, I did do research, but the website was absolutely full of shit or I got things mixed up in my head.
When you buy mice, you buy two females, NOT two males. Someone retarded said two females don't get along as well. Bullshit.

I'm trying to be optimistic. Because we bought two male feeder mice. They would have been fed to snakes (by fucked up people) so I gave Oliver a better life than he would have had. He was only $2.50. When we bought the babies in the pet store, the lady just snatched up two at random, and when she realized we wanted them as pets, she went "oh, sorry, I didn't know you were going to use them for that". So more than 3/4 of those mice die horribly. If he's already died out there at least he died faster. Like Wess said "If he got eaten by a coyote or something at least he would munch him right up, instead of being slowly digested by a snake"

It still makes me cry thinking about poor Oliver and whenever I'm outside I look for him where he ran off. I even look in the streets to see if I can see him licking up water from the gutter or if I find him as road kill. But I should assume he's already a goner. There are so many birds and things out there.

It makes me really sad because he was my favorite in the beginning. He was really pretty.

What happened was, at first the two of them got along. They even slept on each other, and shared the wheel. But eventually Nolan (other mouse) started attacking Oliver. After maybe two times of doing it with no blood, Nolan stopped. But maybe three or four days later Oliver started biting him like crazy. He wouldn't share the wheel with him, or even take turns, and he would literally bite Nolan off the wheel, and then jump back off just to chase poor Nolan around, biting him. They'd squeak a bunch and I tried to get them apart every time it happened. But no matter how many times I poked Oliver he'd still do it. Even when I took the wheel out to punish them they fought. I waited because there was no blood. But then eventually I got Nolan hand-trained and got a better look. I saw very light pink stuff in the cage in a small amount, on the paper towel I had stuck in there for them to chew at. I thought one of the magenta chew sticks had gotten wet and the dye bled on it, but then I got a good look at Nolan. His tail had a few very small scratches, but on his back just above his tale was dark blood, a scab. I was horrified and told Wess- he was at work. I had read that once they start drawing blood, they'll fight until one is dead.

I separated the two, not wanting Nolan to get worse. I put bedding in a plastic storage box, and food and one of my socks to lay on. I took Nolan out of the cage because I could pick him up easy. He seemed happier away from Oliver. I let him out and played with him on the bed, letting him get his exercise, giving him water every few minutes. I waited until Wess got home to decide what to do next. It was 11:00 PM or so. I didn't know what to do, because we didn't have an extra wheel or water bottle. I didn't want to leave them together for the night, in fear that I'd wake up with one dead. I had already been afraid of that before I had found blood. The pet store is far away, and we would have to take the bus. I suggested to Wess that we take Oliver back to the pet store. He said we shouldn't, because he would get fed to a snake and also it would only get us 3 dollars back. Not to mention we can't bring animals on the bus. He said he didn't want to get another cage. If we left the mice together while we were gone then they'd probably kill each other, and cages and all the accessories are quite expensive. I ruled out adoption for similar reasons, as well as the fact as the person who takes the mouse would probably just feed it to a snake.

We chose to keep 'Nolan the nipper' because he was a sweetie- he would crawl all over us and he had recently stopped biting completely. We could play with him while Oliver refused to ever have anything to do with us. Doesn't mean I didn't love Oliver. Even though I had the bugger for such a short time.

We chose a last resort before letting Oliver go- put them in the cage together(they had only been apart for some minutes) and see if we can train Oliver to at least bite a little less often. We took a air-spray can and sprayed Oliver with it to scare him whenever he nipped Nolan. Some mice-owners recommend spraying the babies with water but we thought air would be better, so they don't catch a cold or something. So we turned out the lights and kept watch over them. Oliver would not stop. We did it at least 8 times and he would not even lessen his attacks. The attacks were every three minutes at least. Nolan kept trying to get out of the cage after we took him out and put him back in again. We took him out and we noticed his back was bleeding a little. Usually the wounds were very minor and unnoticeable. So that was the last straw. I couldn't have them together anymore.

Wess let Oliver outside that night. I was afraid it would be cold but Wess said it was rather warm outside. I didn't go with because I didn't want to see it. Apparently Oliver ran down the driveway and into the bushes. We haven't seen him since.

I cried a bunch because I love mice and felt like it was my fault for being stupid enough to get two males. I had thought they would be okay because they were getting along fine and were probably brothers.

Nothing would make me happier than to see Oliver scurry by one evening when I'm outside walking to meet Wess after work. To know that he may possibly have survived eating bugs and whatever's out there. But I know that's probably not the reality. It'd even be nice to see him dead so I could know what happened, sad as it would be for me.

I threw some mouse food into the bushes to make me feel better. But he probably isn't even nearby anymore.

Maybe I'm being over-dramatic over a mouse that only lives 2 or 3 years max, but I feel terrible, although I feel like it was the best choice.
I'm not a terrible pet owner, promise. I love my pets and take good care of them. I've never had two at once and was unaware that they wouldn't get along, because the websites I read said mice need company. The first mouse I got alone, and that was a huge mistake. So I feel sad that even with the best intentions I've screwed up again.

Nolan seems okay so far but he's been sleeping a lot so I wonder if he's just recovering or if he's depressed. I'm sure he's a little glum because he lost his brother, whom was good company before the attacking. They say you can have a mouse alone if you play with it a lot, and Wess and I do that. So I hope our love can make up for him being alone.

I was a bit worried when I first got the mice because they weren't very friendly. Oliver wouldn't get into my hand and Nolan would nip us like crazy. I was starting to lose faith in the words "Mice never bite unless threatened", and wondered if mice were really such a good idea, but now he's great. Hopefully we'll enjoy Nolan for a number of years to come.

When Nolan passes the next pet we'll get is a hamster. Throughout my life I've owned 4 or 5 hamsters. I would feel better having one next because I know them very well. Also no risk of anything going bad- hamsters never need a companion, and they will quite literally kill each other, no matter who you put them with. I hadn't know mice did that.. but apparently females don't..

I've had one rat. I can hardly remember him. Let me try to remember all our pets. All the ones I don't put parenthesis near or name as an animal are teddy bear hamsters.

Silver fish. Catfish. Guppies. Angel fish. Neon Tetra fish. Serpae Tetra fish. Sucker fish. Walking Sticks Black fire-bellied newts (I loved them so much). Toad (I caught him as a tadpole from a camp site). Froggie 1 and 2 (they were shipped to us from a magazine and died fast). Blackie. Brownie. Snowball (cat). Bobby (parakeet). Stripey (we were young, can you tell? That was the rat). Max. Sally. Keebi (my mouse). Snuffles (my cat). Ricco (Carson's cat). Cocoa (Mom's cat). Frog (fire-bellied toad). Frog 2 (we introduced him and the stress killed the first frog). Oliver and Nolan (mice).

The animals back home that still live are Cocoa, Snuffles, and Ricco. The frog too, which I'm not very fond of. Also the fish. They've been doing good so I imagine they'll live long lives. The one group that has outlived everything we have ever owned are the silver dollar fish (three are still alive, we had about five), and the catfish. They have been living in that same fish tank since maybe 1986. They used to be the size of a quarter, and now they're the size of half a dollar bill. That's just their body, not including fins. So they've been alive for 22 years. I didn't realize that was possible.

I just took a pause to clean out Nolan's cage. He seems very alert and peppy. Maybe he was just tired? Or maybe Oliver's smell scared him. Because Oliver would literally piss on the bars of the cage everywhere to claim territory. Now the bars smell like lemon soap. So Nolan is probably fascinated.

I feel a little better now after writing this. And to anyone who will get angry at me for letting him go- buzz off. I don't want to hear it. I already feel terrible and know it isn't perfectly right so I don't need anyone else telling me that I'm awful to do it or something.

I might go out and look for him one more time, and then say goodbye.
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P.S.

[link] put our engagement date up. Find December 5th.